Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Well that wasn't part of the plan...

...the plan wasn't to lose my job a few months after I bought a new car.
...the plan wasn't to not have a plan if that ever happened.
...the plan wasn't to have it happen right before Christmas.
...the plan was to keep on keepin' on.
I feel very blessed my grandparents gave me money for Christmas which will pay for insurance and my car payment. So even though this wasn't the plan. This is going to work. It has to right?
Because no matter what happens in "my plan", his plan works. So here we go.

Sunday, November 14, 2010


Can I just say that I love Relief Society now!? Holy awesome, shout out to Lexie...best teacher ever!

So today we talked about the Holy Ghost and it was just a bunch of stories people gave of times in their lives that they felt the spirit. I was asked to give one, well she asked me last week but I was thinking about it and most of the ones I remember are times I didn't listen...yikes, I know.

Dating, I know all you married folk time to zone out, is soo stressful and I think a lot of times we make it that way a lot more than it needs to be. Working on it ok. I feel like I'm doing a lot better at not being such a freak. haha So this isn't really a plug about dating now, mostly because I feel like I'm doing fine dating at the moment (not an announcement of anything), but looking back on past relationships obviously the ones that didn't work out I could have been so much more blessed if I followed the answer I "didn't want".

Let's just say I know the feeling you get when something isn't right, I remember getting that every time I was dating someone and it wasn't right. That's I guess what's heart, it wasn't what I wanted, it wasn't what I was praying for, and it wasn't the plan I had set out. And therein lies the problem, what's going to happen in my life isn't my plan I'm not in charges. Ah. haha So here's the feelings I got when it's not His plan in hopes that I'll do better at following-
Right when I got out of high school I started dating hardcore, one guy. It was awesome, he was super funny, fun, cool, and all the things that made life awesome. Things were going great, I was praying about it and never really got an answer that it was right I felt good about it, but I never felt like I got an answer that it was wrong. I went to Women's Conference with no objective but to feel the spirit, mission accomplished. It was so awesome. I was sitting in one session, she wasn't even talking about dating or anything, but I got the strongest feeling that it wasn't going to work. Of course, this wasn't the answer I was looking for or the answer I wanted. I went into the bathroom and prayed that feeling would go away. So I didn't listen...we kept dating, and just like the feeling I got and should have listened to we broke up. It was awful. But I'm so grateful that it didn't work out, I was nineteen for crying out loud. Frankly he married the next girl so congrats to them.
It's like that moment when someone is breaking up with you and you think to yourself this wasn't the plan, I'm supposed to be happy. Where's that guy? So after several failed attempts and what I thought I needed/wanted I'm not paying attention to what I want anymore I'm trying really hard to listen to what He wants.
Note to self: recently I was dating someone it was going well, then of course it got not as well, I really liked him we had so much fun. But I wasn't really being treated in a way that I loved. So I went with the answer I had been given not the answer I necessarily wanted to get, it wasn't right. It wasn't going to work, as much as I wanted it to, as much fun as we had, there's something better somewhere. I've never really broken up with someone, I don't like hurting peoples feelings, it's awful. But I knew the answer, and I knew the outcome might not be what I wanted it to be but it would be either now or a while down the road that this answer was what would happen. Man this doesn't make sense probably to anybody else but me.

So here goes nothing, following the promptings of the Holy Ghost. FOLLOWING. Not leading. It's going to work out. It's going to work out.

It's like when somebody tells you about something they may have done, and there's two reactions you could have: oh my gosh, steer clear of them or oh my gosh, you're not perfect either? Note to self: nobody's perfect. Join the club. But I'm trying really hard to come close? Welcome to life.

I feel like there should be pictures or an update of recent life in the following area, I don't have pictures the only ones I have is from the Nearly Naked Mile that are in Brady's possession. So here's a recap of the now:

Rocket Summer concert, I just have to say that his concerts are the best concerts I have been to in my entire life! I love this guy! He's so into the music. It's amazing. Me and Brando went and well I am very lucky I didn't lose my voice because it was an acoustic concert sing along style, awesome!

Me and Thomas my really good friend went ice skating, it was super fun to catch up! Ice skating hurts a lot more than I remember, and watch out for us in the next Olympics because we're soo good at it. Should have taken pictures...next time.

So this friday they did this thing called the Nearly Naked Mile, it was interesting...haha. Some people should really just wear clothes all the time, it was funny Brady was taking pictures for senate...and well, it was the Nearly Naked Mile if you can imagine. Ben was partly in charge so we went as a fan base, number 1 fan here. I told him that we were going to make posters, but I got nervous. haha So we didn't...but I did make one last night and left it on his car which said the following: Congrats on your naked accomplishments! -Your number 1 fan. I guess I have a picture of that. Success.

Double or Nothing, so my friends started this band in 2004, they had a CD release party on saturday and it was amazing! Compare this CD to their first ones, holy improvement! haha. They had Matt's family all play violins with them, it was sooo cool! And also I got to see my long lost friend Cecilia!! I love that girl, we will be partying soon. Mark my words.

I think that's pretty much the update...Oh and Allison is coming to town! Best Thanksgiving ever! A party is in store, and frankly there will be pictures and fun and friends I never get to see. I love those girls!

So for now, key word is FOLLOWING. Oh and read The Traveler's Gift, it is amazing! Back to reading, thanks Lexie.